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Ariakas 12-27-2009 11:38 PM

Hello from the North
I have been lurking a couple of weeks, I figured i would introduce myself. Great site and I enjoy how open everyone is.

I come into the poly lifestyle in a round about way. Many years ago I started to discover my kinks. I have a few but none are what I would consider out of the ordinary. I just enjoy playing and most of all pleasing women.

I met my wife (A)10 years ago (only been married a year now) and we have always been open and fun. She is and has always been bi. Having a few threesomes, and lots of fun over the years. A few years into our relationship the kink and the fun kind of stopped. It was a combination of things, but the sex just became secondary to our love. (I know cheesy)

Fast forward to a few months ago, we meet this wonderful girl (B) who is intelligent, friendly, flirty and sexual. It re-ignighted our lustful needs and started to bring back a lot of our sex drive. It also showed us what we want, or at least what we think we want. A,B and I have spent a lot of time together over the last few months and have gotten closer (well they have, I may go into details in another thread) and a true friendship has blossomed. With that friendship and caring, also came fantasies of 3 of us being together as a family...A and I see what we want, however B does not wish to go there.

These fantasies bring me here, to figure out what exactly we want, and how to go about getting it. B is still with us, much more friend than lover at this point. This "breakup" (I know, likely the wrong word, but its all I have in my vocabulary for how this feels) has been tough for me because being fluid is difficult in my nature, but I am learning and trying. A is confident things may re-ignite.

I suppose i could mention a location, another person from BC...little town called Whistler. :) Not originally from there, but I have been located there for quite a while :)


ImaginaryIllusion 12-28-2009 02:33 AM

Welcome to the forums.

Ravenesque 12-30-2009 02:11 AM

That's an interesting tale Ariakas. Welcome to the forums! I've joined recently as well. Hope you enjoy it here and connect with like-minded folks. :D


CielDuMatin 12-30-2009 02:53 AM

Ariakas - welcome as well from the closer to the Eastern Seabord of the US.

Each poly story is different, and has it's own quirks and twists, as I'm sure you have found. I hope your path towards what you seek is a smooth one.

I got the privilege of visiting Whistler earlier this year and thoroughly enjoyed it, and everything else BC had to offer. I'm sure you are all gearing up for the Olympics - have they finished the road yet? :)

Ariakas 12-30-2009 05:04 AM

thanks for the welcome and I do hope to make some connections and maybe get some understanding of what my wife and I are looking for. We had always assumed the casual hookup would be the end of it. :)

Ciel - thanks, its been different. The other relationships we had were easy and dismissive. We are still friends but there was never a click. This new girl...it feels like at any given time either of us could have been with her in a relationship. As a 3way it feels the same, but she just keeps pushing. She has been very aware of her bounderies and what she wanted. Hope that makes sense :)...I have to say, I don't miss dating...jeez haha

Are you a mountain biker or golfer? Most people don't visit whistler in the summer otherwise. BC is a stunning place to live, originally from ontario, I moved here to be with my gf who later became my wife. Olympics, yes...gearing up is one word. Most of us locals are burned out, but the olympics will jolt us back into it. I think most of us are planning a prolonged vacation in may haha...and the road is mostly done, I think you can safely get from Van to Whis in 1.5 hours or close to it. :)

FreeandUnited 01-06-2010 11:46 AM

Hi, Ariakas,:)

Newbie here too.

I read your post, and I was just thinking that if "breakup" isn't to your liking and IMO, it seems like a departure from how things were, but I can see how "breakup" doesn't seem like the right wording.

Maybe "transistion" or "evolution"? Just a thought.

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