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-   -   Im having problems dealing.... (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=18275)

uppercaseCHASE 12-04-2011 04:10 PM

Im having problems dealing....
 
Hello, me and my girlfriend have a long distance relationship, we are currently trying to work on things so we arent actually together anymore but hope in the future to be. She tells me yesterday she knows that she wants to love other people and be poly. She used to be so against this and now shes not and honeslty after her saying "your my soul mate" and stuff this is hurting so much.
We see each other 3-4 times a year, so its hard and im a jealous person, and i honestly dont know what to do. Ive been researching non-stop to find out how to deal with this. I love her and I want her to be happy, I just need to adjust to this.
My main concern is since we live so far from each other, everything is going to change. If she meets someone where she lives I feel like I wont exist anymore because il just be "that person on the internet" and we wont be able to Skype as often.
My other concern is im VERY insecure, like VERY, I honestly dont feel good enough for her, even though she has told me she wants me to be one of the relationships in her life I dont feel worth it.
She identifies as lesbian and so do I (but side note, im trans(transgender) guy, yes its confusing because im "suppose" to be straight but no, im a lesbian, but thats beyond the point)
i dont want to be "that transguy im sortof seeing who lives in canada", you know?

im probably the most open minded person ive ever met, but when it comes to my life and my attachment issues and my insecurities, i honestly dont know how to deal.

someone please help me?

redpepper 12-05-2011 07:16 AM

Have you tried looking at some of the threads here on jealousy? You can find them by going to the search engine and pressing "tags." Then writing "jealousy" in the box and entering. There has been a lot of threads that might help you sort some stuff out for yourself. Good luck :)


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