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-   -   Hi, everybody :-) (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17749)

HumbleBee 11-25-2011 01:42 PM

Hi, everybody :-)
 
Am new on this forum, but have known about/ lived with polyamory for some years.
Am a female, passed 40. Married to countli. We're both hetero.
I had a boyfriend last year, my first actual polyrelation outside our, till then, monogamous marriage. Had "read all the books" and "seen all the movies" about poly before I met my bf, but found I was not prepared for the things I was not prepared for, if you understand :-)
Steep learningcurve!
Scared the brains out of me.
Have been digesting all the all the impressions for a year and now feel wiser, at peace and better prepared :-)

Am born emo-poly. I have a flirtatious natur. Not knowing that there was something called polyamory, struggeling to feel content within my monogamous relation made me resentful and made me feel shameful and guilty about my "needs" to flirt and have closer relations to others.

I was relieved (well, at first I wouldn't hear about it at all) when my hubby told me about poly (he stumbled across the term on the net) autumn 2007. We bought books and found a forum in our home country where we started engaging actively.

From what I see on these pages here, I think I would have had a better experience of my polyrelation in 2010 if I knew this forum at that time cause I see many people here with simmilar thoughts that I had back then, but I didn't find support enough locally.
In retrospective that proved to be good, though, cause I feel almost like a new person now, much more confident in what I want, need, understand, expect, accept etc.

By joining this forum I hope to learn even more and have many people to seek advice from in any poly-situation. I also hope to make new friends, but am not shopping for partners :-) I don't have a goal of having a certain poly-lifestyle, but I want/ need to be able to feel normal when I fall in love with someone else than my hubby, and I want to be able to go a bit with the flow and see if the relation is worth fighting for.

Love to all from HumbleBee ;)

HumbleBee 11-28-2011 11:32 AM

Interesting to see that even though one edits and reads ones post over and over, there might be something slippin' :o

I dunno why I wrote (in last paragraph) "life-style" as I actually don't care for that term. I wanted to say I have no plan/ agenda to find a certain amount of partners or to build a certain/spesific polyrelation.

What I want is to be free to enjoy the love I feel for people I connect heart to heart with and then go with the flow in an open and honest way to see if we all make our lives better together.


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