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-   -   Terminology question: Comfortable with mono and non-mono relationships. (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=16632)

OldGuy 11-04-2011 11:59 PM

Terminology question: Comfortable with mono and non-mono relationships.
 
So, I've been reading up on Dan Savage and some other non-monogamy relationship forums, and learning all the new jargon (;)). I haven't actually found a term for what I am, and I was wondering if you guys could enlighten me.

What would you call somebody that doesn't see fidelity or monogamy as having anything to do with "restriction or ownership", meaning that it would be possible to have a healthy mono relationship; but at the same time, would also be willing to have a non-monogamous relationship without too many tribulations. Somebody that is versatile, relationship-wise.

If there isn't a well-known term, this would be an excellent place to start making shit up. :)

AnnabelMore 11-05-2011 12:13 AM

Fidelitiflexible!!!

OldGuy 11-05-2011 12:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnabelMore (Post 109336)
Fidelitiflexible!!!

Did you just make that up? :D

I like it.

AnnabelMore 11-05-2011 12:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OldGuy (Post 109339)
Did you just make that up? :D

I did. :D

OldGuy 11-05-2011 06:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnabelMore (Post 109342)
I did. :D

Have a cookie.

marksbabygirl 11-05-2011 08:46 PM

Monogamish. You'll have to scroll down to the bottom to see Dan Savage's explanation.

OldGuy 11-06-2011 03:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by marksbabygirl (Post 109428)
Monogamish. You'll have to scroll down to the bottom to see Dan Savage's explanation.

According to my Firefox add-on and anti-virus, that link you posted leads to a spam site (there are two "https" in the URL) so I wouldn't open it. I'm guessing that was just a mistake though.

Anyways, from what I've read, "monogamish" seems to be located in that grey area between an open relationship and a monogamous one: Occasional infidelities wouldn't necessarily lead to the threat of a breakup. The distinction between being monogamish and being in an open relationship, is that an OR is more about having the "freedom" to sleep with others if you so desire (proactive), while being monogamish is more about acknowledging, understanding, and being more lenient towards your partner's infidelity (reactive).

^ I have no relationship experience beyond polyamory and some very light swinging...so that may be completely wrong, and I may be full of it. But it seems to me that being monogamish and being in a poly/swinger/open relationship is quite a bit different.

The word I'm thinking of would refer to a person who has a flexible sense of fidelity. ;)

Good luck with your diet btw.

nycindie 11-06-2011 06:01 PM

Human.

SourGirl 11-07-2011 01:51 AM

Well-rounded ? :)

I just lipped off on the jealousy thread, but coming over here, I would say those that can float between various types of relationships, are probably much more well-rounded then those at the extreme ends.
If you enjoy the people that come into your life in whatever form, and respect that, the relationship will build its own style, based on where it needs to be.

nycindie 11-07-2011 04:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SourGirl (Post 109539)
If you enjoy the people that come into your life in whatever form, and respect that, the relationship will build its own style, based on where it needs to be.

^^^ I likey!


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