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-   -   10yrs Mono, newly poly - BF and GF within one week! (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14483)

TomTitTot 09-12-2011 09:03 PM

10yrs Mono, newly poly - BF and GF within one week!
Hello everyone!

My wife and I, monogamous partners of ten years, have recently become poly. After a month of in-depth and serious emotional discussion, much of it difficult, we decided to pursue triad relationships to ease ourselves into poly. We're both bisexual, so our options are fairly broad in a sense.

Now, after we decided to start coming out to people, it turns out that 1) lots of our friends are secretly in poly/open relationships, and 2) we quickly realized that some of these friends find us - both of us! - very attractive. Essentially within one week of becoming poly we found ourselves with a boyfriend and girlfriend! Given our generally low opinion of ourselves, this has been somewhat eye-opening and flattering!

We're still suffering from some difficulty, emotional turbulence, but overall this has been an amazing experience, and we're very happy to be on this path together, still deeply in love and supporting one another.

Just wanted to share, and also hoping to have interesting discussion with other poly people here!

IrisAwakened 09-12-2011 10:32 PM

Wow, how exciting! It is amazing when things actually start to come together when they once seemed so far off and impossible. I am sure everyone else will concur, but, be careful with your hearts (if you are bearing them). "Easy come, easy go" but I don't always believe that. Truly, I have no idea what the background story is here (your new SOs, were you friends first? Close friends?).

Enjoy and love it!

TomTitTot 09-15-2011 12:30 AM

Our BF was an acquaintance that we're both very fond of, and keen to be closer with. Our GF is a long-time friend that, when we came out to her, revealed that she has been in an open relationship with her BF for a few months, and has had a crush on both of us for a very long time.

So yeah, we're pretty lucky. GF lives far away, but is staying for the entire weekend, and we're very excited. Planning once-a-month visits from her, and probably more often from the BF, as he's not local, but is much closer.

We're prepared for things to be occasionally difficult and problematic - what relationships aren't? - but are enjoying being on this journey together. My wife is possibly the most awesome person ever, and we're in an incredibly strong place in our relationship right now. So all seems well for the time being. :)

JuliaGay 09-15-2011 03:24 AM

Sounds like you are really luck, TTT! Can I have some of that? :p

And it sounds like you have your heads on straight, knowing that things won't always be hunky-dory. :)


TomTitTot 09-16-2011 11:29 AM

Thanks, Julia!

We're very excited - our GF is spending the whole weekend with us, starting tonight! I have butterflies. Even if nothing sexual happens, it's just so exciting to be able to talk openly and frankly about our sexuality with someone we care about, and who understands where we're coming from. :)

Kealoha 09-17-2011 08:10 PM

*laughs* I'm already jealous! Most of our long-time friends can't even handle if they think one of us is looking at other people! We both get scolded...you are super lucky! I tip my virtual hat and congratulate you both. :D Have fun and good luck!

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