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-   -   Hello from London, UK (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=13367)

Volleyop 08-12-2011 04:01 PM

Hello from London, UK
 
Hello everyone!

I'm fairly new to polyamory and my main appeal for polyamory is about the very deliberate focus on and requirement of honesty, respect and love in every relationship.

When I started studying polyamory a few years ago (mainly to study the true nature of jealousy) I realised that (apart from physical intimacy), that this is largely how all my close friendships function anyway, especially with my female friends.

Unfortunately, I have no experience being in a polyamorous relationship. Most of my life I have been a "serial monogamist", causing me and my partners suffering time and time again, because either my partner or I became convinced we were with the wrong person and had to find "The Right ONE". Had any of those relationships been polyamorous, no (or at least very little) suffering would even have occurred.

My biggest problem with monogamy is that it directly celebrates and justifies jealousy in really destructive ways because of the assumption that jealousy equals love, when jealousy is fundamentally about insecurity. Recently, I had the opportunity to feel true compersion for the first time, and it was a very powerful liberation, both emotionally and spiritually, combined with a level of pure joy I had never felt before! It's really hard to describe, but after this epiphany, life will never be the same again!

All these things put together, polyamory is just the natural path for me to follow, simply to be true to myself.

So, here I am!

;)

Kishou 08-13-2011 03:31 AM

I agree that monogamy seems to really deconstruct polyamory and the ideas it entails. Doesn't help that christianity seems to bash it in the head with a mallet, and people seem to find it some poor loophole excuse for gay marriage (which is still facing some trouble in the limelight, but thankfully, not at as much as years before).

It's nice to meet other people with similar ideas here. Welcome.

signalfire 12-20-2011 10:16 PM

I'm very new to the idea as well, but the thought you've put into it is very interesting, everything you said in your post is so thoughtful. :D

Volleyop 12-20-2011 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by signalfire (Post 116663)
I'm very new to the idea as well, but the thought you've put into it is very interesting, everything you said in your post is so thoughtful. :D

Ooh, thank you!


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