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Student 10-28-2009 03:06 AM

Hello everyone! Hi my name is Braxton. I am doing research and a paper on the awareness of polygamy. I am focusing on polygamy in men. What are your thoughts and feeling toward it and how does it all affect you. Please tell me your thoughts and feeling about this. Also this is strictly confidential. I will be using your words but i will not be using your names. i hope you all can help me out!! Please reply back to me ASAP and in a private message or to my email. Jadoremoose@gmail.com.

Thank you,

rolypoly 10-28-2009 06:27 AM

Polygamy is not the same thing as polyamory.

greenearthal 10-28-2009 01:00 PM

Most polyamorous circles of which I'm aware have a strong concentration of feminists. Almost all the feminists I've ever met take a very dim view on traditional polygamy.

Fidelia 10-28-2009 07:39 PM

:rolleyes: And wouldn't polygamy in men be polyandry anyway? :cool:

AutumnalTone 10-29-2009 03:07 AM

Polygamy = many women
Polyandry = many men

I'm thinking a conservative Mormon site would be a much better place to ask about polygamy.

Fidelia 10-29-2009 03:33 AM

With respect, O thou sage and mighty Moderator ;),

Polygamy is defined as " marriage in which a spouse of either sex may have more than one mate at the same time"

Polyandry is defined as " the state or practice of having more than one husband or male mate at one time"

Polygyny is defined as "the state or practice of having more than one wife or female mate at a time"

if the Merriam-Webster dictionary can be trusted.

Sunshinegrl 10-29-2009 03:56 AM

Dude..Wrong tree to bark up. Just sayin.


HappiestManAlive 11-01-2009 01:47 AM

1st - "conservative Mormon sites" will take a FAR dimmer view of his research than anyone here, LOL. The offshoot groups such as the Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints or the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints are where you would start, and neither has anything to do with the actual Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Just sayin', lol.

Technically speaking, all of those terms fit with Polyamory. The "split" is in those groups that are usually associated with the term. Many of the "polygamist" groups - noteably those two mentioned above - participate in practices that many Poly people would consider abhorent; arranged marriages, underage marriages, sometimes incest.

So really - as much as I'll get flamed for saying it - Polygamist groups very much fall under "our" umbrella, by definition. ;)

Baernin 11-01-2009 01:17 PM

After all, he needs a lot of research if he leaves us wondering wether or not he's talking about polygamy or polygyny right? If he's just looking into polygamy in men, he actually would be interested in say, mono's viewpoint. As far as 'traditional polygamy' goes, I'm fine with it. I just have a problem with half the men who practice it. If my husband met a woman we both cared about enough and she cared about us enough to want to have children together, I'd be totally supportive of us marrying her, even if I didn't personally want to have sex with her. That would make Eric a man with two wives, which on the surface, since we also both happen to be Christians, would be polygyny, christian, traditional polygyny even. Maybe, just maybe, somebody should be exposing him to what commited, healthy, poly relationships with consenting loving respectful adults looks like, even if he is just looking at one man many woman set-ups.

Joreth 11-02-2009 04:05 AM

As someone already said, POLYGAMY is multiple marriages with no reference to gender. POLYGYNY is multiple wives and POLYANDRY is multiple husbands.

None of these words references the presence or absence of love, nor do they reference religion or social values.

I see a lot of people here confusing the most well-known examples with the definition of the word.

If there is love in a multi-person marriage, it is polyamory, by definition.

If there is marriage in a multi-person romantic relationship, it is polygamy, by definition.

These are overlapping concepts - both address different things.

Polyamory references the loving relationship, there may or may not be marriage.

Polygamy references the marriage, there may or may not be love.

If people would stop stereotyping and making assumptions about other lifestyles, and use the words properly, then this is an entirely appropriate place for someone to ask about one's feelings regarding polygamy.

Polygamy, by itself, is not an inherently bad thing. Patriarchal, religious, discriminatory structures that use terror and intimidation to control the population and abuse young children (girls being forced into marriage and boys being "ejected" from the community to eliminate competition) are the problems here, and these kinds of tragedies can be found in monogamous cults as well as polygamous ones.

Please, save your outrage for the individuals perpetrating the abuse and do not confuse those examples with the label they adopted for themselves. Remember, people do that to us. We should have learned this lesson by now.

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