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-   -   Work in progress Pt.3 (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1005)

DragonBorn 10-22-2009 06:38 AM

Work in progress Pt.3
Hello, I’m DragonBorn and I am the "third" with Dragonfly and NightDragon.

Um… well, first off, I think of myself as Mono-ish… I know I can love multiple people. However, I seem to have a hang-up with sharing someone that I would consider “mine” sexually… I don’t have many problems like that with Dragonfly, well, because she’s not mine. Though I did tell her that I don’t think I could handle her with another man other than Nightdragon of course. So…make of that what you will.

I’m into video games, mostly on the PC. I’m an avid player of MMORPG’S of any variety and have an un-natural weakness for Rock band, especially when I’m the drummer! Um… I like Cars of all variety’s and usually enjoy working on, and modifying them. As far as our relationship goes it is definitely a work in progress. We have always spent a lot of time talking out our issues and fears, and where we see this relationship going.
We started this around 2 months ago, and it has definitely been a racecar of emotions since the start... I love them both, I truly do, and I can see such amazing potential in this relationship that we have.

As of right now, I am in the boyfriend position, which I am more than happy to be in. NightDragon and Dragonfly are so amazing. The fact that they have allowed me to have that title after so little time, the effort they are making to work through some of our issues is astonishing, they have shared with me, something so special, and I really can’t express how thankful I am for that. But the feelings between Dragonfly and I have been going at super speed, and just last week, she informed NightDragon that she is in love with me, and this, he was not ready for, and really I don’t know how this has happened between us so fast. It kind of scares me to know that she has fallen for me so fast, and that I feel the same way about her. I know given time, and patience that these feelings and emotions will calm down at least somewhat, maybe after the shiny and new gets a little dusty and scratched. :)

So, here I am. Scared that this will end in disaster, and wondering what happens next. Trying my damndest to let him know I have no intention, want, desire, or need to replace him, and trying to hold back the feelings I have towards her in an attempt to help ease the stress of this latest discovery.

Input is greatly appreciated, no matter how blunt it may be.

Tech 10-22-2009 07:22 PM

Welcome DB.

I like your intro. I am also a gamer. :)

I am the hubby in a trio (would be ND's role in your trio).

Reading it allowed me to see how our 3rd would feel, and he has felt alot of what you expressed. He gets very jealous of my wife's attention - but not towards me. I think what you are feeling is perfectly normal. :)

We've been working on our trio for a few months now, and I see us as still very new.

Good luck in your relationship & endeavors!

MonoVCPHG 10-22-2009 07:26 PM

I'm a boyfriend too! As Tech said, your feelings are normal. I had them too and still have them in other areas. Sounds like you are doing fine :)


ramfish 10-23-2009 04:14 PM

Welcome DB! I'm pretty new here too. Hang in there and take things day by day. I have to remind myself of this often. It can be a rollercoaster of emotions but when the great moments are outshining the down ones, you know it's totally worth it.

HappiestManAlive 10-23-2009 05:41 PM

Good to hear from you, now we've met all three of you! Welcome!

I've been bugging both of your partners to meet up with us, our two triads; I've been finding other poly groups in the area and wanting to meet them too - there isn't any formal network of poly's in Vegas that I've found, and I think it would be good to get at least a loose network going, people to hang aroud that understand the concept so that all our social time isn't spent explaining to people what's going on. I've actually been accused of being a pimp walking through hotels with my two girls, lol, security wanted to know here we were going and why I was with them. :rolleyes:

ANyway - now that I know there's a car guy in your group, both of our other partners are out of luck. :D

DragonBorn 10-23-2009 08:22 PM

Well, I don't think I would have a problem meeting up with you guys, who knows, could be fun :D

And thanks to the rest of you for the welcome notes!

Off to work I go! :)

LovingRadiance 10-23-2009 08:44 PM

Welcome. Glad to meet the final party! ;)
We're in a similar situation as well. GreenGecko who just joined the board is my boyfriend and Maca is my husband.

Keep talking and keep smiling!

kajira 10-23-2009 10:16 PM

i am relatively new, too.

That was a great introduction, by the way.


Legion 10-25-2009 12:36 AM

Congratulations on love! It makes me feel nice and warm to hear how you are feeling and idk really know your situation other than the little bit you have here but it sounds like there is some mutual love and respect going on. I know it's scary too, damn love is so crazy because you open up and as you open up it gets so good but then it opens you up vulnerable as well and idk what happens next but my blunt advice is remember you are all vulnerable and you all have to trust and be trustworthy and take care of each other. Best of luck because it is so easy and so hard this paradox of love!

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