Infinity
New member
To the poly people who do not like to practice hierarchical poly: how does the idea of marriage fit in with this?
I see a few people on this site who are married to one partner and maybe have another who they consider an equal primary (such as, a husband and a boyfriend). How does this work with them being equal, when that is not represented in your legal arrangements? Have any of you considered divorcing the 'married' partner, so that the relationships can truly be 'equal'?
Another question to those who do not practice hierarchy: would you be in a relationship with someone who IS married? What if they expressed to you that you mean the same to them as their spouse - would that be enough, or would the fact that they are married always mean it felt 'unequal' in some way?
I don't see how non-hierarchical poly and legal marriage can go hand in hand. But I'm open to ideas
Of course, I differentiate between legal and non-legal marriage. For example, a person could have two partners and have a commitment ceremony with each which legally meant nothing but emotionally was very significant.
The thing with marriage though is that there can only be one partner, married, legally. This to me makes it inherently unequal.
I see a few people on this site who are married to one partner and maybe have another who they consider an equal primary (such as, a husband and a boyfriend). How does this work with them being equal, when that is not represented in your legal arrangements? Have any of you considered divorcing the 'married' partner, so that the relationships can truly be 'equal'?
Another question to those who do not practice hierarchy: would you be in a relationship with someone who IS married? What if they expressed to you that you mean the same to them as their spouse - would that be enough, or would the fact that they are married always mean it felt 'unequal' in some way?
I don't see how non-hierarchical poly and legal marriage can go hand in hand. But I'm open to ideas
Of course, I differentiate between legal and non-legal marriage. For example, a person could have two partners and have a commitment ceremony with each which legally meant nothing but emotionally was very significant.
The thing with marriage though is that there can only be one partner, married, legally. This to me makes it inherently unequal.