Meet and Greets?

[TL4everu2]

My wife and I are considering setting up a meet and greet group once a month or so. Has anyone else here done this before?

If so, how did it go and give us some details. We could use all the help we can get.

[NeonKaos]

What sort of venue do you plan to use?

[TL4everu2]

Good question....I would think possibly something along the lines of the local swingers clubs....because those places are open to that kind of thing, whereas most other places aren't. Plus, at those, there are places to sit and talk, and other places to dance. All under one roof. ;)


Of course, I'm TOTALLY open to ideas! I just don't want it to be a discussion/support group.

[NeonKaos]

Do you want it to be a space dedicated to your event, or do you want to simply meet somewhere where the general public is also present?

You could have it at a park or some other outdoor setting. I think it's better to have these things in an environment where other activities are present so that people can form connections based on how they would hang out in their everyday lives. Swingers clubs, and other dedicated venues, often focus on the one narrow aspect of entertainment. Besides, a lot of people, not just polyamorous people, are turned off by what they think of as the "bar" or "club" scene.

You might consider using an art gallery type of space and having a "wine tasting" or something like that. I'm not sure where you are located but if you are near northeastern Massachusetts I have an idea for a place you can use.

Just some things to consider.

[marksbabygirl]

I started a munch for local kinksters in my area.

I created an event on a website I frequent - and then showed up.

I set up in a local bar - there's a back area that's somewhat secluded - and we've met there 2nd Sunday of every month for the last 4 or 5 months.

Attendance has been as little as me, to as many as 8? I think was the most.

Its been fun, and something I'll continue to do :)

[TL4everu2]

Do you want it to be a space dedicated to your event, or do you want to simply meet somewhere where the general public is also present?

You could have it at a park or some other outdoor setting. I think it's better to have these things in an environment where other activities are present so that people can form connections based on how they would hang out in their everyday lives. Swingers clubs, and other dedicated venues, often focus on the one narrow aspect of entertainment. Besides, a lot of people, not just polyamorous people, are turned off by what they think of as the "bar" or "club" scene.

You might consider using an art gallery type of space and having a "wine tasting" or something like that. I'm not sure where you are located but if you are near northeastern Massachusetts I have an idea for a place you can use.

Just some things to consider.I like your ideas. My wife was so kind as to remind me the reasons why we no longer frequent the swingers clubs. LOL The issue I have, is this: $$$ It seems as though almost anything costs money. And I has none. :( LOL Now, I like the idea of going to an art gallery. I also like the idea of a wine tasting event. (I've never been to one before)

The idea behind going to a club or bar type place, was that it typically attracts a younger crowd. Now, at 39, I'm not exactly "young"......but I feel out of place amongst people who are in their late 40's and above. LOL I'm such a disgusting person sometimes. LOL


Anyway, keep the ideas coming guys....L and I will pick one out and try it out a few times and see what happens.


p.s. We are in the Tampa Florida area.

[marksbabygirl]

The idea behind going to a club or bar type place, was that it typically attracts a younger crowd. Now, at 39, I'm not exactly "young"......but I feel out of place amongst people who are in their late 40's and above. LOL I'm such a disgusting person sometimes. LOL

The bar I chose is a neighborhood pub. It doubles as a sports bar and everyone from 18-80 goes there. Its a nice place.

I have no other suggestions - but good luck!

[Ariakas]

You might want to make it as neutral a location as possible. You may make a number of poly people uncomfortable hosting it at a swingers club. :)...

[NeonKaos]

I like your ideas. My wife was so kind as to remind me the reasons why we no longer frequent the swingers clubs. LOL The issue I have, is this: $$$ It seems as though almost anything costs money. And I has none.


This is why I suggested a public park. Don't you have a park nearby with picnic tables and basketball or tennis courts? People could bring their own food. You have to eat no matter what.



The idea behind going to a club or bar type place, was that it typically attracts a younger crowd. Now, at 39, I'm not exactly "young"......but I feel out of place amongst people who are in their late 40's and above. LOL I'm such a disgusting person sometimes. LOL


Those young hot people would probably feel "out of place" around you. Attitudes can be contagious.

[TL4everu2]

Public park is good...and sounds fun....Of course, we could always go kayaking from that meet up point if ppl wanted to. Hmmm...Gears grinding and smoke is billowing as I think harder and harder. LOL

And I never said young "hot" people...Just a younger crowd. Unfortunatly, I relate better to the late 20's early 30's crowd better than people my own age. That has a lot to do with my wife and I looking a lot younger than we actually are. ;)

[NeonKaos]

And I never said young "hot" people...Just a younger crowd. Unfortunatly, I relate better to the late 20's early 30's crowd better than people my own age. That has a lot to do with my wife and I looking a lot younger than we actually are. ;)


I guess i'm glad I won't be going to this event. You probably wouldn't be able to "relate" to me because I'm the same age as you, even though I also look a lot younger, and I'd hate to waste your time.

[TL4everu2]

I guess i'm glad I won't be going to this event. You probably wouldn't be able to "relate" to me because I'm the same age as you, even though I also look a lot younger, and I'd hate to waste your time.:( Thats too bad.

[swfltriad]

Are you planing an event in Tampa or further south? What nights? We are intered in attending such an event.:)

[TL4everu2]

Actually, like a lot of other things in our lives, this has slipped our minds and we completely forgot about it. :( No idea yet on a day or time. :(

[MaximumENTP]

Age is a state of mind. I have met more mature 20 year olds than some of the 40+ year olds I know.

Specially when it comes to emotional maturity.

Something strikes me as a bit head-in-the-sand about people I've known who are on wife or husband number 3, and continue to say things like "I just know this person is my one true love!" <drooling ensues>.

This is obviously only one group specific example, but you get the picture.

[Breathesgirl]

We've attended both munches & very informal get togethers.

Generally if they are held in a public place like park or restaurant the newbies will feel less threatened because they are familiar with what they are seeing.

The one restaurant our Brunches used to be held in had a back room where we could all go, talk up a storm, meet new people & not worry about the general public hearing things which might upset them or things which the kids ought not to hear. That back room would hold 30 or so people and the wait staff were very courteous and attentive without standing at your elbow.

Another venue had a back room as well, not as big, but was quite adequate for our needs.

Both of these were family restaurants & on main line bus routes so those without reliable transportation could get there as well.

We've had them in parks and pubs (we're a double university town plus multiple colleges). For those of us who are financially challenged the park is a wonderful idea--there are many different things to do, couples/diads/etc. can go off by themselves for a few minutes, they are kid friendly if you can't find a babysitter.

Check the local poly calendar for a night when there's little to nothing happening & set the date by that (you might want to check the local BDSM calendar as well since they two lifestyles do tend to go well together), check with the venue you choose to use whether that day & time are free & book it if it is. You will also want to make sure that they know everyone gets their own bill so you, as host, don't get stuck with it.

Our local BDSM community simply bills itself as an internet group so when newbies get there they just have to ask for the internet group & they'll be directed to us.

If you choose an outdoor venue you will also want to consider the long term weather forecast, lol, and maybe have an alternate venue available just in case.

When we meet at the park it's a pot luck, kids and furbabies are welcome.

[FireChild]

For minimal bucks you can start a group on Meetup.com and just set up meetups at various places....parks, restaurants....

[TL4everu2]

Ok, we have set a date...Sept 25th.

Now we just need a place. :rolleyes: LOL We are looking into the local parks....but we were thinking possibly at the beach or a city park. We want this to be a family friendly event, where poly's can meet and socialize with each other with the knowledge in mind that everyone there is open to the idea of poly.

[swfltriad]

Well, let us know where and the time. I hope we can make it. The kids have games on the 25th in the Cape, then we need to get to Tampa to a hotel before the Steeler/Buc game on the 26th. So, maybe we can stop by and meet everyone.:)

[Thunderlizard]

Although it's true that the swingers' clubs might make some people uncomfortable, we have an "adult" club here in Calgary that's not open every day of the week... so they've started a Poly meet and greet on the first wednesday of the month.
It's Poly people showing up for a Poly event, having Poly talk, and there's no "swing scene" going on at all.

Something to consider.. they charge a tiny admission for use of the space, but that's reasonable, and they supply snacks and non-alcoholic beverages too.

Anyhow, we've been enjoying it for sure. Food for thought for you perhaps.

[pilot414]

Although it's true that the swingers' clubs might make some people uncomfortable, we have an "adult" club here in Calgary that's not open every day of the week... so they've started a Poly meet and greet on the first wednesday of the month.
It's Poly people showing up for a Poly event, having Poly talk, and there's no "swing scene" going on at all.

Something to consider.. they charge a tiny admission for use of the space, but that's reasonable, and they supply snacks and non-alcoholic beverages too.

Anyhow, we've been enjoying it for sure. Food for thought for you perhaps.

Which club is this? I am visiting Calgary for a while

[Seasnail]

As someone relatively new: openminded and curious but pretty much in the closet, my two cents!

Location, location, location!! If you want to meet new people and be welcoming, as other posters mentioned, comfortable public places such as parks and restaurants are GREAT! Also, the bus access is important to consider: not just if a bus runs nearby, but also how often, and how late... I know I'd opt not to go if I wasn't sure of making my bus connection home at night.:rolleyes: And I applaud the "internet group" name, which allows someone who's curious but not committed to accept the invitation with relative ease, while also not lying.

Good luck! Let us know how it goes.