age old question

[Kraven]

Maybe you're tired of hearing it, frustrated with answering it so consider it an update...maybe someone found a secret place lol

Where does one go to to find love in the lifestyle, how does one go about finding someone to share this wonderful experience with when you're single? Opening a relationship is one thing but you're single and you want nothing to do with monogamy, you want to hit the gate running and loving on a multi-person level...what do you do?

Any advise...

[Jericka]

I use OKCupid. There are a fair number of poly folk with profiles there. It is easier to weed out the people who are really not polyamorous than meeting people in a bar or elsewhere.

[Cloud]

I know its not easy being single in this lifestyle. I was there. . . But it is not impossible to find someone/couple even if you are a single. To what other mono single does, except, you have to let them know you are poly. Sooner the better.

Wish you the best. :)

[drtalon]

Find a local group and be social: http://www.polymatchmaker.com/main.mvc?Screen=MAIN&MODULE=POLYGROUP

[nycindie]

Many threads here on this subject, with good info. Do a Tag Search for: "dating" , "meeting people"

[RfromRMC]

Local poly groups and poly meetups is the first step I'd try. Get out there and meet people! :cool:
Worldwide list at polygroups.com

Online dating is the next step. Polymatchmaker is the only real poly-oriented site, and then you got okcupid is not poly but poly-friendly. Try both.

[strixish]

First, make friends with poly people. Meet-ups, munches, etc., are a great resource. Go to them first with the intention of developing a network of like-minded friends (not for finding partners). Make friends, and meet their friends.

Second, now that you know a lot of poly people, start looking for people to date.

My long term relationships all started out as long term friends.

[enduser76]

Although I am new to the idea of poly/open, I have found that other people alike that I have met have always been honest and open from our first meeting about being open/poly - that is something I have and will be applying when and if I find someone of interest. :)

[feelyunicorn]

I`m in the same spot between a rock and a hard place. I am trying to meet people both in non-monogamous groups, and LGBT clubs.

I might as well fag it out. j/k ;)

[nycindie]

Don't limit yourself to dating only people who label themselves poly or belong to poly groups, etc. In most places, that would be a very small community. There are plenty of "civilians" who are open to non-exclusivity and have never heard the word "polyamory" before. Just be honest whenever you approach someone.

[enduser76]

Don't limit yourself to dating only people who label themselves poly or belong to poly groups, etc. In most places, that would be a very small community. There are plenty of "civilians" who are open to non-exclusivity and have never heard the word "polyamory" before. Just be honest whenever you approach someone.

I agree with this statement completely. That is how I found myself on these forums, last year, after re-evaluating my past monogamous relationships (7 years, 3 years and on and off with a couple of others in a matter of months) I met someone that plainly and honestly said "Maybe you're not wired to be sexually monogamous."

That not only made sense to me, but it opened up a window (then a door, a plane and a space-shuttle at warp speed) into my new understanding of myself and honest-communication.

In that time, I too have been honest with people I meet, let it be a hook-up, monogamous, poly, etc. I say what I'm looking for, can honestly say that I'm not looking to be sexually monogamous and those that understand, accept it, those that don't, don't. Save's us all a lot of trouble. ;)