Pennsylvania Couple Has Polyamorous Epiphany

[Justsayneigh]

So I may have been looking for a creative title :-) It is true though.

My husband and I have been trying for years to define as best we could how we feel about relationships with others. We weren't ones to have a bunch of acquaintances / casual friends and could never figure out why. We knew we weren't into swinging since we can't get into physical relationships if there isn't a mental connection (especially in one night!).

I spent some time with another woman but she wasn't into a relationship with someone who was married to a guy. So that wasn't the answer either.

After pinging the internet for months on end - we came across the term polyamory. And there it was - what we were looking for. The kind of relationship with someone that goes much deeper than the causal date and is much more than just intimacy.

So - any other PA people on here that know of this "polyamory" thing :p

I would love to eventually find a female companion with whom I can share my experiences in this life with.

S&S

[wallabumba]

Hey, I'm out here in PA too. Feel free to message me to get a discussion going. :)

[JaneQSmythe]

We are 30-somethings in SW PA.

I've never really "looked for" relationships/friendships - they just seem to happen to me. So I'm no good on the "how do you find someone" type of questions. But would be happy to discuss poly (or PA...or anything).

I, personally, have never been one to have lots of casual friends/acquaintances either. As an introvert I find that social interactions with people that AREN'T partners or close friends to be emotionally draining. Interestingly, this doesn't apply to posting/interacting in the forums...where I can get my thoughts all organized and typed up:)

[karatekid7412589]

I am in south jersey close to philly, so I dont know how close you are to philly but we can still chat about poly if you guys are too far!

[drtalon]

Pittsburgh and Philadelphia metro areas have large polyamory communities. The best advice for finding local groups is at the bottom of Alan's event list (http://polyevents.blogspot.com/#localgroups).

[Phillychick]

Hi, Just Say Neigh,

Loved what you wrote about finding it challenging to connect with someone enough for a physical relationship in one night. As I learn more about poly, the focus on actually forming a relationship with someone is one of the most appealing things. My partner and I had our epiphany recently too, and that's really what it felt like - like all of a sudden a lightbulb went off - maybe we could keep our relationship intact and still develop relationships with people who could bring different energy and qualities to the table. Since you and your husband have a head start on us, I'm curious how it's going for you? We're in SE PA, by the by.

[swmnkdinthervr]

Hello "JSN"

We're near Gettysburg, we have "found" the polyamory approach to be VERY much what we're looking for...sadly we find there are few in our area that view relationships as we do. Good luck in finding the partner(s) you are looking for!

[KyrasPet]

In central PA (York county) area. Poly curious, just getting our feet wet.

[JJ87]

Hi. South Central PA here. Also getting our feet wet :) We are this <-> close to Gettysburg and go there every chance we get!

[kemperfish]

Welcome to the club!!!! Polyamory hit us very much the same way. We attempted in many ways to find like minded friends but this was difficult. I can assure you that Pittsburgh does NOT have a large organized and active poly community, though there are many poly folks here. We recently learned the importance of a supportive poly community so we are willing to drive to meet people and attend meetings. Anyone anywhere from the middle of PA to the middle of Ohio that is interested in creating such a community, please message us. We need to find and also to give support in this lifestyle.

Best of luck to everyone on their relationships and searching.

[swmnkdinthervr]

We would be interested in connecting with everyone, we're going to keep an eye on this thread. :D

[kemperfish]

We are hoping many people are interested in meeting everyone. There is a social group here for Pittsburgh but it is open to everyone in interested.

[HerrKen]

Hello all,
Me and My wife are newer to Polyamory. We had one Polyfidelty type relationship thus far. We actually met her at a pagan herbal class. Unfortunetly we ended it with her due to some gold digging. But until the finacial mayhem we did great . Me and My wife realized how strong and trusting we are of each other. So long story short we back on the hunt so to speak, and hope to make some poly friends along the way here in the Keystone.

[Sorsha]

Hubby and I are close to NW PA and like to travel. We are a very strong couple who have been together for over 20 years. We like to meet new people and have fun. We don't really drink or party but like to camp and play cards.

We've only had one relationship and we're looking to try again.

[swmnkdinthervr]

Sigh...wish we were all just a bit closer together!

[kemperfish]

Sorsha,
It sounds as though we have some similar interests. We don't do partying and I drink very rarely; he not at all. We enjoy playing cards and traveling as well.

Swim,
I couldn't agree with that statment more!

[Sorsha]

There needs to be a "like" button on the forum ;)

[PyrateGal]

Hi there folks,

Finding this forum today has been a freekin' GODSEND, seriously, I nearly cried to see this whole thread of folks in our state who are like us. My guy and I tried mono and it didn't work for us...now that we've opened up, things couldn't be better between us (he in his own place and me in mine). The problem, though, is finding like-minded folks who don't judge us, let alone close friends we can become involved with. We just don't even know where to start.

He is SWM 32, straight, I am SWF, 42, bi. We want to form an equilateral triangle (she would NOT be our pet or our toy!!) with a woman but are also open to swinging with couples, where the ladies are both bi and the men are both straight. At this point, he sees me and one other lady (who sees nobody but him), he is my only guy and I also see girls. Our ultimate situation, again, would be a triad with another lady where we are equal with each other and can pair up separately or love all together.

We are clean, honest, kind, open, and honorable. We are goth/geek folks, both good-looking BBW's who are proud of our talents in and outside the bedroom. I like to think we are cool and funny. We love movies, video games, fine food, wine, and adventures. We like to describe ourselves as pirates.

If any of you would like to befriend us, we are very open. If you have advice on how we can get hooked in locally (Pittsburgh) with like-minded people, that would be AMAZING.

Seriously...I am nearly in tears to have found this site because while my guy and I are sooooo happy with the rules we're living by, we feel kind of isolated having only changed our relationship last month and not knowing how to meet up with like-minded folks. Thank you SO MUCH in advance, anyone who reaches out.

[kanddrew]

Amazing! My husband and I have been searching for this group. We are a poly couple in SW PA, close-ish to WV. Although we're both young (24 & 25), I've always known I identified as poly. I spent so long trying to explain it to relationship after relationship, only to be told what I was talking about was cheating or swinging. We were an equilateral triangle most recently, but unfortunately our third met a girl who was not open to poly and he decided to pursue that relationship instead. I'm finding that it is nearly impossible to meet people like us in this area, even more so because we have a son and we have to be careful who we get to know. I'm so glad to have finally found a group of people who get it and if something gets set up in the Pittsburgh area we'd be glad to come out for it!

[kemperfish]

The sentiments expressed by everyone in Western PA reflect exactly how we feel. Isolated and with no one who really understands. Can't be open with all our freinds and have very little opportunity to socialized openly without people freaking out that one of us is looking at someone, or worse yet, that the other is supportive LOL.....
We are invested in building the poly community in Western PA, but we need help. We started a group for us here under community called Pittsburgh Polyamory. Please join us and spread the word. It should only take a few of us to get organized and build a support group for all of us who are feeling isolated.
I just cannot understand why none of the previous groups are still active when so many in our area are seeking support.

We are very much looking forward to the day when Pittsburgh Poly is an active and supportive community.

[Justsayneigh]

Thanks to everyone for keeping this thread alive!

We are still trying to meet people in our area (when not working out crazy schedules). Cautiously optomistic at this point. :cool:

Are there any websites out there that anyone would recommend that we join? I would think there are plenty of like minded people in existence.