Facebook Friends

[DrunkenPorcupine]

What criteria do you use to add Facebook friends? I'm curious, especially after seeing so many "add me" signatures. :)

[crisare]

For me, Facebook friends come in 3 categories:

Real life friends (who have complete access)
Online friends (who I've met on various sites)
Clients (who have limited access)

My FB page is as much a marketing tool for my business and my message board as it is for my friends ... so I'm pretty careful about who I add.

[DrunkenPorcupine]

I realized I didn't give my criteria.

I'm a political activist, so I use my political platform as a guide. If someone is in my network of friends and like-minded people, I'll add them.

Additionally, if I know someone personally (and I consider online relationships to be personal relationships) I'll add them.

There are some exceptions to these rules, but that's a new thread. :P

[NeonKaos]

Everything that I share on my Facebook page are the kinds of things you would know about me if you met me at a party or something. My photo albums and notes are tweaked for specific people or groups of people, but there is no information on there that I wouldn't shout from the rooftops anyway, and certainly nothing "secret" that I would be worried about getting in trouble for (not that I ever do anything like that, I'm an absolute goody-two-shoes and would never even do so much as jaywalk:cool:). Also, I check my credit report for strange activity, but my credit score isn't that great in the first place so no one would get very far with it even if they did try to steal my identity.

So to answer your question - I'm pretty laid-back about adding people, but I do treat it on a case-by-case basis.

[MonoVCPHG]

I'm more picky about family and people I know than I am about total strangers. I don't care what strangers know about me but am guarded about what "actual" friends see and know. I have 483 facebook friends and less than 50 of them are actually people I know or care to know. I simply add them to fill up a sad little facebook game I play LOL! I'm not a privacy advocate or paranoid about identity theft...I've got nothing to hide on there.

[AutumnalTone]

The bulk my friends on FB are people I attended school with. Some of Curly's relatives whom I've never met are also in my group, plus my sister and sister-in-law (though my daughter is on FB, she's not on my friends list, yet her mother is). Then I have Burner peeps, Pagan peeps, drum corps peeps, and some folks left over from my first batch of friends on FB.

When I first joined, I found a group and contributed to it right away. The founder of the group was pleasantly surprised (it was a music group with few formally-trained musicians on it) by me offering up a bunch of information out of the blue. He made me an officer of the group and directed people from his network to friend me. I had a group of 70 or so friends pop up--musicians from around the world. Once I got my feet under me, I pared most of them from my friends list, though a few remain that I've had direct interaction with online.

I'm not terribly picky about adding folks to the FB friends list. I don't blog anything extremely personal there. I blog (and repost it) on other sites, so my friends lists on those sites are much smaller. On Tribe or LJ, my standards are much different for adding folks to my list, for that's where my blog appears with all sorts of juicy stuff in it--whether debuting art or reporting medical results (and how unemployment is literally killing me slowly) or how I processed the breakup with L all those months ago.

The peeps on those sites all know I'm poly and Pagan, along with hearing about the drum corps, the artwork, the other hobbies, and so on and so forth. Some of the folks on FB do, most don't. At least one has figured out Curly and I are poly from my profile, though I doubt most would bother to put two and two together.

[redpepper]

I have mostly poly friends and highschool friends. Makes for interesting comments sometimes :p

I don't have much criteria, but I do a lot of privacy stuff where necessary. Sometimes I feel I am waaaayyy to out there and feel vulnerable to some people, so I block them from stuff...

haven't figured out how to get "privacy" for videos though.. still working on that. Anyone?

[glowinthedarkstars]

I love making new facebook friends.

[nikkiana]

In general, I'm fairly liberal about who I friend... I have friends from elementary school, high school, college. People from my industry. Coworkers. Family... I tend to be a little more reserved about people I meet on message boards, I don't usually friend them on FB unless I've gotten to know them via IM.

[Lostkeysintro]

I like facebook for the game apps. So I have added a lot of strangers just so I can have neighbors on my apps. I don't use facebook like I do myspace. I have no pictures on my facebook or anything. It's not my main social network. It's just the one with the best apps.

[Catfish]

At first, I kept FB for people I have actually met face to face. Then all my high school friends started finding me. Then people who have seen my band. Now I have now idea who I've met in real life and who's and internet acquaintance. So when I get a friend request these days it mostly depends on who our mutual friends are. It's sort of like the mob. Are you a friend of mine or a friend of ours?

[indigo]

I recently split my FB accounts and created a new one for clients. It was making me uncomfortable to edit my posts in order not to offend my (sometimes) deeply religious clientele, besides, they just don't need to know my joys and sorrows.

So for my personal FB account I will friend anyone who would recognize me in public and say a friendly hello AND those online people whose posts, thoughts or lives interest me.

There are a fair number of fellow cyclists on there, too but we are definitely part of a community and during race season much useful chatter happens.

[nymphs]

If u want me to add u I don't mind I just have friends, co-workers and family just message me and I'll add :)

[marksbabygirl]

I add anyone to facebook who wants to get to know ME the person - so basically anyone who wants to know any of me - not just the one facet of me that they know from the website they met me on.

Anyone who is a part of my facebook is aware that my minor children are my facebook friends (my 8 & 10 year old) and that I WILL delete anything inappropriate that they may see.

[Breathesgirl]

my teens are on mt f-list as well :). It's the only way I know what's going kon in their lives sometimes *sigh*. I have a variety of people on there from app neighbours to online friends to family, i'm not pickif anyone wants to add me feel free to PM me for the info.

[TL4everu2]

I actually just went through my FB account and cleaned house. Basically, if you don't know me in real life, you're not on my FB friends list. Simple. I got tired of having people postinbg in spanish, french, and arabic. I don't understand any of those languages, so I deleted them first. Then I got into a depression state, and deleted everyone else that I had never met in person before.

So in order to be on my facebook, I have to know you personally and have met you in person.

[Ariakas]

I actually just went through my FB account and cleaned house. Basically, if you don't know me in real life, you're not on my FB friends list. Simple. I got tired of having people postinbg in spanish, french, and arabic. I don't understand any of those languages, so I deleted them first. Then I got into a depression state, and deleted everyone else that I had never met in person before.

So in order to be on my facebook, I have to know you personally and have met you in person.

haha...why not just hide them from your wall :)...:P

[TL4everu2]

Partially because I don't know how....Partially because I figure if I don't know them in real life, then I don't/won't ever meet them since we don't really "socialize" at all. Plus, I could honestly not care if they just woke up, or if they went for a bike ride, or any number of other odd things they may choose to post about. I also have no real desire to meet people online, who I'll likely never speak to in person.

[Ariakas]

Partially because I don't know how....Partially because I figure if I don't know them in real life, then I don't/won't ever meet them since we don't really "socialize" at all. Plus, I could honestly not care if they just woke up, or if they went for a bike ride, or any number of other odd things they may choose to post about. I also have no real desire to meet people online, who I'll likely never speak to in person.

Well if you ever want to just hide someone, hover to right of an entry on your wall, a little "hide" should appear. Click on it and it will give you options

FANTASTIC for hiding all those stupid games everyone plays.

[AutumnalTone]

FANTASTIC for hiding all those stupid games everyone plays.

If you use Firefox, there's a filter available that will remove much of the crap from your feed. Game postings, reports that so&so added so&so to their friends list, and so on.

The filter won't guarantee never seeing all of that because FB tweaks its code regularly and the filter won't remove stuff affected by the tweaks. It is updated fairly regularly to deal with the changes, though, and makes FB much easier to deal with.

You can find it at chocolatesoftware.com.

[TL4everu2]

LOL All this removal....I just remove the "friends" on the list. 99% of them I've never met, nor talked to online...so they were simply a thing on my FB.

[redpepper]

I pretty much friend anyone. Most of my active friends on fb are from here or my poly community here. I'm good with privacy settings for those I feel too vulnerable with. If anyone wants to add me I'm game as long they have actually posted on here (over 100 now). I quite often get random requests from people who haven't. I kinda feel better about knowing something about people.

[clairegoad]

I actually just went through my FB account and cleaned house. Basically, if you don't know me in real life, you're not on my FB friends list. Simple. I got tired of having people postinbg in spanish, french, and arabic. I don't understand any of those languages, so I deleted them first. Then I got into a depression state, and deleted everyone else that I had never met in person before.

So in order to be on my facebook, I have to know you personally and have met you in person.

This is my criteria also.. Most of my "friends" are actually family members.. Facebook is how I stay in touch with my cousins.

[SchrodingersCat]

I friend anyone, if I know where they're from. i.e. if you're some random person and I have no idea how you found me, then I ignore you. But if you're from some group I'm in, or we've messaged a few times, etc., then I'll accept.

That being said, I have a privacy list for people I am personally friends with (not just people I've met, but people I would have over for tea). They have access to my information, everyone else just gets my hometown and current city, and my likes/interests. They don't know my relationships, my status updates, contact info, etc. My privacy settings are setup so that by default, you get nothing, and I have to specifically add you to my "Know Personally" list for you to see anything interesting.

I went through a games phase where I was adding anyone who played farmville, cafe world, or that fish tank game... then I got busy with school and decided I didn't want complete strangers whom I knew nothing about on my friends list, so I deleted anyone I didn't recognize.

[SchrodingersCat]

LoL, I'm also friends with the Dali Llama, and Erwin Schrodinger :P

[redpepper]

I'm embarrassed to say that quite often I develop friendships on there that are stronger than on here and then forget what a persons on line name is and talk t them like I don't know more about them than their poly lives....:o

If I haven't added you and you would like to be my friend on fb, please ask :)

[phoenix762]

I used to have people on FB that I met on BB or other online sites, etc.
I stopped that...after a rather odd experience with a person I met online that I didn't know in RL....(wasn't bad, really, just...well..odd).
Almost ALL of the people I have are friends I know in RL, with the exception of about...I think about 4-5? They are: family, friends (and family members of friends), former classmates, former roommates in a group home I lived in as a teen, former coworkers and current coworkers.

[Breathesgirl]

If you use Firefox, there's a filter available that will remove much of the crap from your feed. Game postings, reports that so&so added so&so to their friends list, and so on.

The filter won't guarantee never seeing all of that because FB tweaks its code regularly and the filter won't remove stuff affected by the tweaks. It is updated fairly regularly to deal with the changes, though, and makes FB much easier to deal with.

You can find it at chocolatesoftware.com.

OMG thank you so very much! On FB you can't hide JUST the apps notifiers without hiding what your friends are saying as well so this may just solve my problem! No, I don't want to hide the friends because they are family & what they say is important to me.

I am going to share that link with friends, lol, so they can stop being frustrated as well.

[Ariakas]

OMG thank you so very much! On FB you can't hide JUST the apps notifiers without hiding what your friends are saying as well so this may just solve my problem! No, I don't want to hide the friends because they are family & what they say is important to me.

I am going to share that link with friends, lol, so they can stop being frustrated as well.

ummmm...yes you can :eek: ... I do it all the time. When you go to hide something it asks if you want to hide the person, or the app itself.

[FitChick]

most of my FB friends are people I was at school with,family or clients/business networks.. :)
If any of you want to add me on FB,PM me your name/details and I will add you ;)

[Andy4700]

My rule is that anyone I add on facebook has to be part of my real life... either as a real life friend or family member, or as an online friend that I talk to frequently.

I don't like having people on the list that I no longer am in contact with.

[LoveLeigh]

Honestly I have to be able to corrilate your "name" with at least one other thing I do. Sometimes I add people if they ask for one of my games, but in order to get into Leigh's FB Club you have to prove she knows you, (and doesn't hate you.) It's pretty simple... People from here, for instance, could talk to me & obtain my FB ID then friend me with a reminder that I know them from here & they can be my friend.
Before any of you do this you need to make sure you really want to know how GOD AWFUL BORING my life truely is and how much time I spend on FB on any given day...
Well so YOU ALL may not want to, but anyway...

[phoenix762]

Know what I did? I made 2 accounts...one for people I know in RL, and one for people I know in the virtual world. I should have done it a lot sooner, but, oh, well.

[kymberleea]

I am on facebook i talk to family and friends on there who dont know most of my other life most dont accept me for who i am now they wont accept my separation nor our divorce even though its been a year they are not accepting but a few of my poly friends are on my facebook we talk private and are respectful of each other but its one of the ways we keep in touch but as i say we are repectful enough to know not all are open to our lifestyle choices.:cool:

kym
if anyone wishes to add me to face book you can message me private and i will gladly add you to my facebook page.:)

[Livingmybestlife]

I just deleted my facebook account so my toxic bitch sister, can find nothing out about me. Anyone I truly care about knows how to get to me. She however, abused the privildge to know anything about my life.

[MrDreadful]

I'm on Facebook quite frequently... almost all of my friends I know IRL or have become friends with online previous to adding then on FB. There are a couple of people I don't know outside FB in my friends list, mostly because they proved to be a favourable combination of amusing and intelligent when I interrogated them about why they want to friend a complete stranger.

[redpepper]

My facebook is almost entirely poly now. That's exciting to me! The more the merrier. I hide a bit, but those that have objected have de-friended. At least I think they have because of that. Actually most of the people on there I don't talk to. I like seeing their up dates etc. but other than that, life goes on... I certainly never feel alone!

[kymberleea]

i love facebook i dont play farmville or that sort but its a nice place to keep up with current events with famiily and now with my new poly family too so it will be interesting too see what happens i know some have had problems with facebook but so far i have not had a single problem on there myspace now thats a different story all together

yahoo way different topic but then again the internet is a strange place but in so maniy ways its good and bad but with out it how would we find each other.

I know for a long time i have felt so alone and isolated now maybe i wont thanks to finding this list and some other sites and i am going to the poly tampa meeting this sunday so hoping to put faces to some of the ones I have met here maybe make a friend or two. :rolleyes:

Kym

[MsKtty89]

I'll add most people to Facebook. A lot of them are old classmates that I no longer talk to, but I like to see updates (who married who, who bought a house, who had a baby, etc.) and on rare occasions I will comment on them or ask them how they are. Another chunk are people I know online, most of which I keep decent contact with. Then there are the people that are my IRL friends now.

I don't add people I don't know from somewhere. :D

But if anyone here wants to add me there, I'd be all for it... Just be sure to put in the add that you're from here. http://www.facebook.com/MsKtty89

I do not play Farmville, Mafia Wars, or any of those other things, so you guys know.

[RGee91]

I have 4 types of people on my list

1. People I know in real life (and don't absolutely hate... well some of them I just don't hate 'much' lol)
2. People I know from various online sites who I befriended.
3. Sublebrities from youtube, and other people who I talk to about their videos.
4. People who I have mutual friends with, who posts interesting things.

I can at least say where I know each person from, except for 2, who seem to have just appeared on my list, but I see no reason to remove... yet.

[RGee91]

Oh and if you want to add me, say so :)

I'm a pop culture nerd, so expect video game/celebrity/song lyric posts galore. I sometimes make funnies, and every now and then post about my life/emotion without giving too much detail.... I feel like this is a personal ad now, should I mention I like long walks on the beach now? lol XD

[openmarriagelove]

I have two Facebook accounts. One that is a professional/clean version of myself where I let my clients add me, and friends who I am not comfortable sharing every detail of my life with, and family. The other account is the real me, where I let people in who are comfortable with my marriage situation, and me in general. It's more of a Facebook for people who love me for me. It's like I live a double life, and can sometimes get really annoying, but it is what it is.

xo